G-NT3806KSJP

tumescent summer sky [// A stranger enters the house,]




   


        // A stranger enters the house,                                   and their smell,
          a sharp sprig of parsley,                                   lemon-bright, pierces
       the muddled cup of                                  homely smells // Today I find
                  the cracked                                                   cap of the egg,
         blue, smooth and glossy,                          on the ground under her nest
         // After being bedbound                                  with illness, I gasp to see
     the relentless progression of time,                                   dandelions in bloom,
     dandelions in fluffy seed,                              tiny white and blue lawn flowers,
             branches dipping                                          into regions of sun and
                 shade, a swallow dives through                                  the scene,
     my mother’s voice on the phone                            // The main predators of
       robin’s eggs are blue                                  jays, crows, snakes, squirrels //
      Buttery radiance of evening sun              // The shucked shell of a cat claw,
           hooked, hornlike, hollow,                                 resembles a goblet for
           a goblin // D texts,                                       which cheese to buy, or
           both // When marriage’s                              exchanges turns us into
             deliverers of lists                                  // Cats as matching circles
      side by side // What is                                  my smell, what is the smell of
             this house // I’m                                  the king of the castle, Mommy’s
            a dirty rascal!
// I’ve lived                                  in certain apartments
            where the smell of place was                          so distinct and indelible,
                   in closets and cupboards,                                   that although
        the smell would recede from notice                   in daily life, when I returned
                             from a trip,                                   there it was again
                  // Whether the feminine has                                     an unconscious
            or whether it is the unconscious 
                                // A kid on a scooter
            comes careening around the corner                           // As though the
      smell were the reality of that                             apartment, a truth that could be
              ignored in the dulling                                               habits of routine,
                     but which became plain                                         fact again
              with a little distance                                                    // A butterfly
                orange and black                                        rests on a leaf, slowly
            opening and closing its wings                                     // New summer
             in the leaves,                                    new sun, new leaves, wet earth,
        car exhaust, cigarette smoke                                 // Do not mow! Native garden
        // A worn wish / a belt                                  loop / a crimson flannel bodice
        // Then is a little distance the truth                   lens to this ungainly telescope
                  // I adjust the star                                  diagonal // How many
                     days can I not                             write the email // A woman
              pushing two children in a stroller                      stops mid-intersection
            to scream at the car,                                             How long are you going to
                        take to make that                                         turn?
// Forget
               the truth of things                                             or choose not to see
               // The vast depths of                                    her rage, she unleashes
        // Turning back at the threshold                                  to take one more look,
                  and remembering, Oh                                    // She roars, and
                  she is mythic // Today                                         the sky is flat
       grey with little variation                               // Reflections within reflections,
     one window to another                                  window speaks // Sometimes I
      say yes when I cannot                                   understand what the children
               say, and they sometimes                                     are satisfied by
      my affirmation,                                    but sometimes they seem to guess
                   my uncertainty,                                                or think my
             agreement                                               improbable, so they say
      the indecipherable sentence                                   again more insistently,
                       again the same                                         vociferance
  syllable for syllable,                           consonantal peaks and hallooing hollows
                 more firmly articulated                                     // A thought
 rushes faster than the music,                             thumping out ahead of the beat
          // Against against                                  against // The dress will fit
           perfectly, I can tell                                    as it hangs on the rack,
   while the salesperson boasts that                                  it has remarkably little
  fabric, but I am rushing                                  because I need to go spelunking
            for my mother who is                                       somewhere in this
                         subterranean                                       labyrinth of
                 interconnected                                               retail outlets,
         supine on a scaffold, washing                                   display windows
              // A possibility                                     opens under the surface
                      of things,                                      not necessarily for
           comprehension, but for                                     the availability of
     some other mode of                                             understanding, through
          relation                                                // A little distance // Again
murmur, Mmm hmm







Note


“Whether the feminine has an unconscious …”: Luce Irigaray, This Sex Which Is Not One, trans. Catherine Porter and Carolyn Burke (Ithaca, NY: Cornell University Press, 1985).



Claire Marie Stancek is a writer, editor, and educator. The poems included here are taken from her forthcoming Double Life (Omnidawn, 2027), which is a book of 36 poems, each in 36 sections, written in her 36th year, an homage to Lyn Hejinian’s My Life. Claire Marie’s poetry collections include Operating Moon (Pinsapo, 2026), wyrd] bird (Omnidawn, 2020), Oil Spell (Omnidawn, 2018), and MOUTHS (Noemi, 2017). Claire Marie co-founded and co-edits Nion Editions, a chapbook press. She lives in Philadelphia. Learn more at clairemariestancek.com